Hi Todd, thank you for your help once again.We are indeed at odds in most issues, there is just so much difference between us. Even at best I often feel some sort of stress when interacting with him as if anything might accidentally trigger another conflict for months.
Our mother suffers from depression due to her own issues. She is often affected by him as he worries her and she would be afraid of triggering him. She often says that he is a child so me who is more mature should be the adult. I wouldn't be too surprised of favoritism towards him because there might be guilt of neglect towards him when he was little and she believes that it is what caused him issues. I lived mostly with my grandparents in childhood so I suffered less from our parents' issues.
Our dad, according to my mom, is often criticizing him harshly which is probably the tension you described. My parents are also often at odds with each other. Also, since I have a more stable and secured life and my brother has lots of problems in his relationships and jobs, it probably worsened all the deeper issues and favoritism. My mother might feel the need to protect him more than me while expecting me to figure all out.
In the end I just don't know what to do anymore. Sometimes I feel upset about them, sometimes I can empathize with them, and yet sometimes I'm just tired recourring issues when there is no strength from their part to get over the issues.
I care about being with them but I don't know how to keep things going. Now that I have a kid I'm worried if all these issues might end up affecting him so I'm trying to understand and hopefully protect him from this. Not that I'm issues free but I'm scared of how intense it has been from their side.
Again, thank you for always being so helpful.